Friendly relationships usually appear due to several reasons: common interests, mutual support, need for communication. However, a friendship develops differently with men and women.
To be more precise
Male friendship revolves around common interests and taking part in some activities whereas female one is based on a personal relationship. Regardless of the fact that there are more similarities than differences in the dynamics of a friendly relationship, men and women view friendship differently. The same can be said about the way both sexes communicate with friends.
A relationship between female friends is typically very intimate and deeper while a relationship between male friends isn’t that serious. Thus, there is no wonder that women need face-to-face communication: female friends communicate more emotionally, eagerly share their thoughts and emotions, support each other.
Despite the fact that men are less emotional in friendship, their relationship is not as fragile as women. Men are getting closer to general pursuits, such as sports, while Ukrainian women prefer to share personal secrets, talk and spend time together.
Activity vs communication
For male friends, it’s more important to do something together, side by side, not to communicate face-to-face. Their relationships with friends aren’t as emotionally close; predominantly, they care about mutual benefit “you do this for me, I do that for you”. Unlike women, men usually don’t need to discuss any life changes with their friends, and they even don’t need to constantly keep in touch with them. The point is that it’s quite normal for men not to communicate with a person and yet consider them a close friend. Vice versa, if a woman hasn’t communicated with her female friend for a long time, she is most likely to decide that their friendship is over.
Men make friends easier than women because they don’t suspect each other’s hidden motives and don’t feel the need to share personal information to stay friends. At the same time, men who aren’t likely to share emotions with male friends, tend to eagerly share their feelings with wives, girlfriends, sisters, or female friends.
Main differences between male and female friendship
- male friendship appears and is preserved on the basis of common activities, interests, and hobbies;
- a friendship between women evolves on the ground of emotional intimacy, communication, and common support;
- in men’s friendship, there is less spiritual and emotional intimacy;
- men don’t need constant communication with their male friends, which cannot be said about women;
- women are emotionally attached to their female friends, which makes them more dependent on each other;
- after a quarrel or an argument, men tend to preserve a friendly relationship while women are more likely to break up;
- women need more communication with those they consider friends;
- men tease their friends more often and joke about them considering this a harmless entertainment;
- women usually don’t resort to teasing because of the fear to offend each other;
- men prefer communicating in a large company whereas women are likely to go somewhere with one nice female friend.
Now let’s see if men and women can be friends
From a psychological point of view, there is a definite answer to this eternal question: no. A friendship between a man and a woman is an unnatural form of a mutual relationship, which can exist for a relatively long time only in two cases: either people like each other but there are reasons why they can’t become lovers or one partner desperately wants a love relationship while another one is ignoring such hints!
A man-woman friendship is a relative notion since they represent opposite sexes and they can be attracted only if they like each other. A woman is weak and fragile, how can she be a friend for a man if the main element of friendship is support, and how can a woman support someone she subconsciously considers a defender and the head of a family?
Contradictions
How can a man consider a woman a friend? The point is that in the first place, he feels her smell, evaluates her appearance, subconsciously she is a sexual object for him. If, to top it all, she is beautiful, animal instincts conquer him, and she becomes prey in his eyes. Of course, he can talk with her about spiritual matters, ignore his body signals, and convince himself that it is simply a friendship. Until that special moment comes…
So, they become friends. Their friendship is sweet and nice until mutual pieces of advice and anxieties lead them into one bed. As a rule, it happens when they both have some problems, for example, within a family circle. Pain, offense, and disappointment unite them. They’ve reached a perfect mutual understanding and taste their feelings telling each other about their problems. After a couple of drinks, he accompanies her home, and then she, with tears in her eyes, asks him not to leave her alone in such a difficult moment.
As a true gentleman and genuine friend, he accepts her invitation for a cup of coffee. After this, it’s time to go to bed. They lie down on one bed, nothing special, like friends. Finally, a light touch of her hand becomes the factor that ruins their relationship. They’ve tried a forbidden fruit. This is a typical model of how a friendly relationship between a man and a woman develops.
Three types of friendship between a man and a woman
The first type: if these are pupils, as a rule, a boy is in love with a girl. Talking about adults, more often, a woman perceives her male friend as an ideal, but he doesn’t consider her as a sexual object due to a large number of options he has.
The second type: a friendship between a married man and a married woman. In this case, a friendship depends only on both “friends’” moral values and a relationship with their partner. Sooner or later, this relationship will lead them to one bed since if they both are friends for a long time, it means they don’t receive enough warmth within a family circle.
The third type: former lovers. A man and a woman were lovers, they parted, but it turned out that they didn’t want to lose that intimate or business-like communication they worked out as a couple, and they stayed friends. This type of friendship is the strongest because these friends of the opposite sex have already been at the point all other “friends” are trying to reach!
Thus, if you have a friend of the opposite sex, try to analyze your feelings. Do you find him/her physically attractive? Consider the fact that it may lead to sexual intimacy. Do you want that? Continue communicating. Are you afraid of that? Try to stop that friendship. Doubt it may really happen? Read our article once more!
